At the start of this year I cleared out my phone contacts, my Facebook friends and who I followed on Instagram. I instantly felt such a sense of freshness, a freedom. I realised there were a lot of people that I just didn’t need in my life, people who did not bring anything to make my life better each day. I was holding onto those relationships, but why?
I felt like the more friends I had, the better my life would be and the more people would like me. The more friends on Facebook I had meant I was popular and again, more people would like me. This is so ridiculous to me now. Why should I have to tell the whole world about my life and gain “Likes” from them to feel successful, accomplished and loved. If I just looked around, I would see that the people who do love me and are proud of me, I see everyday or catch up with regularly. Not those who only want to know when it suits them.
It wasn’t a New Year’s resolution (I don’t believe in these), it was just something I felt the need to do. I saw that my life could be better when I wasn’t hanging on to these “sometimes friends” who were bringing me down.
These people were always such a struggle to keep a relationship with and they only wanted to know you when they wanted something or someone to fill a temporary void. When the void was filled they flicked you off again…until the next time.
I finally saw the light. I do not need these sorts of people in my life. They were fun to hang out with initially but then I was putting in a lot more effort than they were. They would talk about me to others, hang out only when their first option couldn’t and generally make me not enjoy hanging out with them anymore because I feared what they might think of me being me. I wasn’t being myself.
I didn’t want to make decisions based upon this fear of what others may think of me anymore and instead just do it because I want to do it. I wanted to do what made me happy and put a middle finger up to anyone who didn’t like it or thought it was weird. Yes, people have their own opinions and interests but I didn’t have to let those define what I did.
I needed to listen to my heart, and follow what it was telling me, valuing myself as a person and let go of these fears of what others think. Who cares!
I feel so powerful now, so free. Simply because I let go of negative people and their judgement defining what I do, by making me think they might not like me if I act that way, do that thing, don’t hang out with the right group or don’t have over 1000 friends on Facebook.
Take my lead and finally do the things you have been wanting to but didn’t in fear that others would not like it or treat you differently. This blog is the perfect example. I held off for a long time because I didn’t want people to judge my writing. At the end of the day, it’s your life you are living, not anyone else’s. If someone doesn’t like it – appreciate their opinion, but just carry on. It’s your journey, not their’s. You never know who you might be inspiring.